Shoeless Flight

Author – Jimbo

I have recently been on a lads trip to Vegas. We had a brilliant time partying every night. Our last night was no exception even though we had a morning flight the next day. In fact we never really got to bed. We had two flights home, Vegas to Manchester, England via Chicago. At the airport we had to take off our shoes and queue to go through security. I put my trainers in the same tray as Marks shoes but the security guy said one pair only per tray. It was busy and I was unable to add an extra tray into the solid line of trays waiting to be scanned, so the guy advised me to use another security line. Instead of picking up my trainers I deliberately removed Mark’s Adidas trainers leaving mine in his tray and walked in my socks to another queue on the other side of the hall. I placed Mark’s trainers in another tray and went through the metal detector. I was still quicker than the lads in the other queue. I quickly walked back to the original security screener where I collected my shoes and bag. The lads eventually got through their metal detector and started to grab their shoes and carry on bags. As we put on our shoes Gaz asked Mark what he was waiting for. “My trainers” he said. He asked a security guy if his shoes had been taken away for more checks. The guy said no and asked Mark if he was sure he had placed them in a tray. Mark was getting annoyed stood in his socks. The security guard used his radio to give a description of Mark’s trainers. After 15 minutes another guard arrived carrying the missing trainers. “They where in a tray at the far end of the hall” she said with a stern voice. I burst out laughing as Mark put on his shoes. Did you do that? he said. All the lads laughed as I told them what I’d done much to Mark’s annoyance.
The flight to Chicago was full, four hours cramped in an economy seat, I was hoping the next flight wasn’t as full as I needed some sleep. After an uneventful but long wait at Chicago we boarded the Manchester flight. We were near the front of economy, Mark sat next to me in the centre row. Once in the air I kicked off my Nikes and tried to get comfortable, eventually the seat belt sign went off and I legged it to the toilet, not a good idea in socks but I was desperate. Walking back I noticed a full row of empty seats, blankets where neatly placed on the seats so I knew they weren’t occupied. I decided there an then that they where mine. I lifted all the arm rests and laid down across all the seats and went to sleep. I’d slept for the full eight hour flight, only being woken by the flight attendant who said I needed to sit upright and fasten my seat belt. I was about to get up and return to my original seat but she wouldn’t allow it as the seat belt sign was on. I sat there shoeless awaiting the plane to land. After landing and taxiing to the terminal, everyone stood up before the seat belt sign went off blocking my path back to my original seat. I waited again still shoeless until everyone started disembarking. Eventually I reached my original seat, grabbed my bag from the overhead locker and searched under the seat for my trainers but they where gone. I waited until everyone got off I got down on the floor to check under all the seats. The flight attendant asked what I was doing, I told her my shoes are missing. She really didn’t know what to do or say but advised me to report it to ground staff. I walked off the plane shoeless, fortunately I used an air bridge and did not have to use steps and walk across the tarmac in socked feet. Being the last off the plane nobody could see my shoeless feet. Unfortunately, as anyone using T2 at Manchester knows just how long the walk is to immigration. I tried phoning the lads, I assumed they must already be at immigration as they weren’t answering their phones. As I continued walking in my white socks the concourse started filling with passengers from other flights. I was becoming concious of other passengers staring at my shoeless feet. Upon arrival at the immigration hall the queues were out the door. Forty five minutes of waiting in line I got through the automatic passport control kiosk meaning no awkward questions about my now dirty white socked feet. I eventually caught up with the lads in the baggage reclaim hall. “Who took my shoes?” I asked as they laughed at my the situation. Then laughed again as they stared at the luggage carousel where my suitcase was going around with my trainers placed on top. “We are even now” said Mark. Gaz said that I was lucky as he wanted to take my bag aswell, leaving me stranded ‘airside’ without my passport and shoes. I collected my suitcase and Nikes, put them on and we all headed for the exit.


New year’s Eve

Author – John Salt

I’d been looking forward to a romantic New Year’s Eve with the girlfriend for a long time. We had booked a suite in a London hotel, where we were due to attend a champagne party in the ballroom.

The big day finally arrived, and after checking in we went up to our room to shower and change – she now wearing a beautiful black shift dress & heels, whilst I wore a grey suit and brand new black brogues.

It was still only 8:00pm and we thought it too early to join the party. Luckily the hotel had provided a bottle of champagne on ice as part of the package. As I opened the bottle the girlfriend commented how romantic I was to have arranged such a lovely evening. I’d never considered myself remotely romantic, but in an attempt to enter into the spirit of things I replied “If I were really a true romantic, I would be drinking champagne from my lady’s shoe. Sadly I’m not!”

I sat beside her on the sofa and prepared to pour the champagne into two glasses. She, however, suddenly stood and announced “Well … I am romantic, even if you’re not! And drinking champagne from a your lady’s shoe sounds very romantic! But if you don’t want to … we’ll just have to change things round a little …”

She stood, smiling, then knelt down beside my legs. She pulled my right leg towards her and began to unlace my right shoe. I couldn’t believe it – “You can’t be serious!”

“I am. Seriously romantic!” she answered as she slipped my shoe from my black socked foot. I really didn’t believe she would actually do it, but she did … pouring champagne into my rather expensive right shoe and taking a sip – “Cheers!”

She rejoined me on the sofa – she giggling and taking occasional sips from the shoe whilst I drank rather more conventionally from a glass. We chatted and laughed and time rolled on. She looked at her watch – “Come on. It’s 9:45. Time to join the party.”

“Darling, you just destroyed my shoe! I’ve only brought this one pair. I can’t go like this!”

She tugged my arm, helping me stand – “Yes you can. Come on Cinderella – you can go exactly like this!” I protested, but she continued to tug me towards the door. I could see was determined and refusal was useless. I could also see she was strangely excited.

Arm in arm we headed down to the ballroom via corridors, lifts and the hotel lobby … my single shoe making the usual tapping noise as we crossed it’s marble floor – in contrast to my silent right socked foot …

The night was yet young – and I was destined to spend the final hours of 2018 and first of 2019 as Cinderella …

Don’t mess with the concrete guys

Author – Debbie Keds

Back in the 1970’s, my god mother Beverly had some guys enlarge the concrete patio around her swimming pool by pouring additional concrete. During the process, Beverly got into an argument with the guys about how they were doing the work. Fortunately, everything worked out fine with the work; however, Beverly had left an older pair of Sears Jeepers Sneakers near her back door. She found them filled with concrete that had dried solid like a rock. It was hilarious!

Shoes in the backyard

Author – Evan

I was walking back from the store with a friend. I had missed kicking a rock and my left shoe flew off past two fences and landed in someone’s backyard.

While trying to hop over towards the neighborhood, my friend grabbed my shoeless foot. I fell onto the ground, which then my friend decided to steal my other shoe and threw it into a fenced backyard of another house. I had to walk to both houses in my mismatched white socks to get my shoes back

Sneaks destroyed

Author – Sockedboy

The other day I spend some time with a few friends after school. We went to a park nearby and fooled around a little. At some point we went in direction of our homes. I made a detour with two others. We have to cycle to school because it’s in the next town about 8 or 9 miles away. On our way we passed a watchtower and we decided to climb up there and have some fun. On our way up the guy behind me noticed the sole of my sneaker came loose, so he told me. When we came on top I sat down and checked my sole. I could see it was little loose but I still could walk on it. They were already well worn and it did not surprise me. Before I could get up one of the guys grabbed my foot and started pulling on the loose sole. He meant that because of the worn state he could tear it completely off and I tried to pull back my foot but I couldn’t. With a ferm pull he took off the sole and said, there you go. The other guy got excited too and he grabbed my other foot and started pulling on the sneaker and said, let’s destroy them both. They were both laughing and slowly my shoe came off my foot and in the same time the other guy had grabbed my soleless sneaker and tried to get it off. A moment later I sat there in my socked feet and the guys started pulling out the inner soles and laces and throwing every part down off the tower. I felt little embarrassed first and asked them not to do it but then I got excited. When I got up on my feet they were tearing the sole off my right sneaker and threw the last parts down. They looked at me standing on the wooden floor in my grey socks. Then they said we assume you got your gymshoes with you. And I said no, they are in the school locker. They laughed again and said, so now you have to go home like this? I said yeah. We stood there for a little time looking down at the parts of what were my sneakers. I was struggling to hide the bump in my trousers because of the excitement and we got down to our cycles and went home. I think this was one of the nicest experience I had till now. I have a few more worn pairs of shoes so maybe I can pull this off sometime again 😁

Playground Football

Author – Wunshu

When I was ten years old I was at a town centre school in England. We didn’t have playing fields, just a tarmac yard, but we did have a bit of a football game in the lunch break. We just played in our usual school clothes, no fancy sports kit.
At one point I was tackling a couple of other guys and I lost my shoe. Before I could retrieve it two boys started to use it as a ball, kicking it between them. One of the boys who had the real ball kicked it high and it went over the wall and into a garden of one of the adjacent houses. There was a crash of breaking glass and the boys thought that it had broken glass in a greenhouse. One of the boys picked up my shoe and threw it over the wall where the ball had gone. I was furious! I had to go into class with one shoe, which was pretty embarrassing, going to two different classrooms. Near the end of the last class the head master came in and asked if anyone had lost a shoe. I went scarlet in the face and had to own up. The owner of the house had found the football and my shoe and put two and two together. I had kicked the ball!
No amount of explaining would convince them what had really happened, and the boys were not going to own up.
My parents got the bill for replacing the broken glass. I couldn’t convince them that I was innocent.
The headmaster didn’t let me have my shoe back until it was time to go home; A shame really because I was really looking forward to going home wearing only one shoe!