Author – Sneaked666
Sometimes life doesn’t quite work out as you expect. Well, actually it almost always doesn’t work out as you expect. It’s not always the big things, sometimes it’s those tiny little moments. A moment, an instance, maybe even something so small that there isn’t a name for it yet.
Except there will be. A mathematician will have named it, even if they don’t actually know it exists. They are a bit like that, everything in order, in its place.
No, I’m not a mathematician, not even close, but suddenly I yearn for things to be in order. In their place. Had that been the case I may not have been doing what I’m doing right now. Hanging around, over a ravine, with just my hoodie stopping me plunging down into the trees below.
I had been out on my trusty board riding down the roads up on the mountains. Man, that board and I had been through some times. It’s so old it originally had a nose guard!I had to replace the wheels and bearings about six times and the trucks actually snapped once! Oh, and the board, so that’s been replaced too.
As I said, that board and I had been through some times! I loved coming up here to feel the wind in my hair as we sped down the hill. There wasn’t any traffic around and the roads were okay; a few potholes which added to the fun. I tended to crouch on the board, keeping the centre of gravity at those speeds helped. Plus should I fall off it was a shorter distance to the deck. Not that I ever had fallen off.
Well, not until today. Had everything been in its rightful place, I’d be at home right now, feet up outside supping a cool one. But that hare that shot across in front of me saw to that and, just to confirm, I did manage to avoid it. The cute little bunny is safe. Unharmed. Probably at home with its feet up.
In swerving to avoid the wretched animal I ended going right into one of those potholes. I was thrown off and sent skidding across the tarmac, shredded the side of my jeans. Which was at least better than it shredding the side of me I guess.
I wore my shoes super sloppy. I didn’t do tricks so it wasn’t a problem; I just rode the road. When I walked the heel would slip clean out of the shoe, leaving the sole on the ground and clean exposing my white socks. I just loved them like that so I usually bought a half size larger – sometimes a full size. I often wondered if they would fly off if I crashed at speed. Well I can answer that question now at least; the answer is no. Although I only have one of my battered black Etnies Callicuts on now.
Anyway, where was I? I slid across the road and suddenly realised I was going over the edge. There were barriers but they were designed to stop cars, not fast moving persons at ground level. ‘This is it’ I thought. That’s when the hood of my hoodie caught on something. There was a ripping sound but it was definitely holding because I was slipping out of it! I managed to grab a bundle of it and it held; my motion was arrested and I hung perilously over the ravine.
I watched my board fly off, hearing the sound it made echo around as it bounced off the side before disappearing into the foliage cover far below.
I looked down to see my sneaker hanging from my white socked foot, held aloft by my toes. I could feel gravity doing what it did, and slowly it slipped off. It dropped down, entering the tree cover before disappearing, leaving my white sock hanging in the breeze, bereaved of the covering it had for so long covered it. Had it become stuck, or did it make it through into the stream that ran at the bottom I wondered.
I heard another ripping noise from above as my hoodie gave a little more. This wasn’t looking good. I made the decision to try to get a bit higher and maybe get a hand onto the barrier support above. I pressed my white socks against the sandstone side, feeling the warm stone through the fabric. I made a little progress before hearing more fabric rending noises. This really wasn’t looking good; this hoodie wasn’t going to last much longer. When life gives you lemons, make lemonade as the saying goes. Thing is, I hate lemonade.
So, options. I could try to get up to the support and cling on until someone came past. I’d need to lose some weight to give me the best chance, and my baggy jeans with a thick chain attached to my wallet filled with coins was certainly a weight. They were starting to slide down anyway. I would need to consign my other shoe to the ravine as well.
But then what? Hang around until someone finds me? And what if their intentions weren’t pure? I’d heard stories of things happening in cars to hapless people in need. Well, I could try to haul myself up completely. Then I’d be left with an hour walk home in just a tee, socks and loose boxers.
I suppose I could lower myself a bit – to the end of the sleeve of my hoodie. I would be a little bit closer to the tree cover below which would break my fall, and hopefully not much else. The trees didn’t look massively inviting and I suspect I might end up with some scratches. Worse still they could catch on my tee and rip it off. Worser still they could do the same for my boxers. On the plus side I might be able to search for my shoes and my board.
Well, both shoes actually. It’s hanging on by my toes right now. Oh, fuck it, they are done. I should have got a new pair ages ago. A little wiggle of my toes and it was gone too, receding into the distance.
If I managed to get down the walk back would be more direct – probably 15 minutes – but it would be through the stream as there were no paths along it. I might end up back in town in just just a pair of wet socks.
Well, fuck, that’s some choice isn’t it? I guess I should be grateful I have choices, but I need some help here. What would you do? Have a think, there’s no rush, I’ll be hanging around for a bit longer…