Drunk swap

Author – Lovetoshoeswap

One weekend a mate of mine told me about a party that a friend of his was throwing and said that we should go to it. I thought too myself why not I could do with a night out. I asked my mate what kind of dress code the party was to which he told me it was casual, so I put on my favourite pair of jeans, a superdry t-shirt and hoodie , a pair of black sports socks and my blue Adidas copas lashed myself in aftershave and headed out for the party. When we arrived at the party it was well under way and full of drunken party guests. After a while I got properly drunk myself and ended up speaking to a guy  who was a similar size to myself wearing a dark blue hoodie, white t shirt and tracksuit bottoms and a pair of black and white checkered hi top vans. In my drunkenness I decided that I wanted to wear his clothes so I asked him if he was up for swapping clothes and shoes. To my surprise he agreed and with that we headed off to find somewhere to swap our stuff. As we started to undress he asked to get my boxer shorts too so I thought what the hell it would be fun, as I slipped myself into his clothes I got a great sense of joy knowing that someone else was wearing my clothes and shoes. We headed back through to the party to continue our drinking. As I mingled with the other partygoers I overheard the guy who was wearing my stuff speaking to someone who complimented him on his clothes to which he thanked them and told them that belonged to him. Upon hearing this I questioned him about getting my stuff back after the party was over to which he told me he was going to be keeping my stuff as he found them comfortable. He then proceeded to leave the party and take off like a bat out of hell up the road. I tried to catch him up but lost him shortly after leaving the house. I was fuming that I never got my stuff back but I slowly started feeling better as his clothes and shoes were quite good quality stuff so it’s not all bad. My mate then decided to head home so I left with him and crashed out in my bed in a drunken stupor still wearing this guys stuff. I awoke the next day feeling really hungover and surprised to see I was wearing, I then felt somewhat bittersweet about the previous night’s actions but decided to keep wearing his stuff as I was starting to quite like it.

Boat shoes

Author – Mike

I attended college in a town that was close to the sea, and I had a rich friend who would often throw parties at the yacht club. This happened at one of these parties. That day I was wearing my worn and loose Adidas Stan smiths with black no-show socks, I had been wearing those shoes for years and hardly ever took them off unless I had to.  The day was clear so I was outside, playing with my sneakers as I relaxed. This blonde guy comes up with a bunch of friends wearing a hot pair of navy blue Sperrys with white laces, I could tell that he had difficulty keeping them on his feet and his white no-show socks popped out of the loose boat shoes every time he took a step. The shoes looked pretty worn, the leather seemed old and the soles were all flat. I knew I had to have those shoes and the rest of the evening I just kept thinking of how I could get my feet into those worn boat shoes.
My chance came soon enough when the host started moving the party over to his yacht. Man, rich frat boys with their boats. The host was pretty protective of his yacht’s wooden flooring, so people had to take their shoes off and leave them at a designated area before boarding the yacht. The boat itself was pretty small, but blonde guy wanted to get on, so his friends and he stepped out of their shoes and left them on the pier before getting on the yacht. Now, with him on the boat and the worn Sperrys left unguarded, it was time for me to grab those shoes.
Looking around I saw that no one was nearby or watching the shoe area except me, so I slid off my sneakers and left them by the side, before slipping my feet into the loose shoes. I couldn’t believe my luck, they were so comfortable, just the right size and fit my feet perfectly. I went back to the clubhouse and took my new shoes off before hiding them in some bushes and going back to the deck to board the yacht. We had a couple drinks on board, played some games, bummed around, then got off when we got bored. As all of us left the yacht we went to put our shoes on and of course blonde guy’s boat shoes were nowhere to be found. He asked if anyone had seen his shoes but no one had seen me putting the boat shoes on, so he had no choice but to leave in his white socks. His socks were so nice that I was dreaming of them being in my sneakers… I offered to lend my shoes to him, saying that it was fine as I was in black socks and he accepted, saying that he really did not want to get his socks dirty. He stuck his feet into my sneakers and I got hot and cold at the same time just seeing someone else in my shoes. I reminded him to return my sneakers later and got them back just as he was leaving early. Said he had to get himself a new pair of shoes now before the shops closed and was pretty upset about losing his favorite pair of shoes. He did not manage to find where I had hidden the boat shoes and left in his white socks. The rest of the evening my sneakers had no chance of staying on my feet as I just kept thinking about the Sperrys I had hidden in the bushes.
As the sun set and more and more people started to drink, I knew it was time to leave, so I got my bag, said my goodbyes and left to retrieve my new shoes from the bushes. When the coast was clear, I took my sneakers off and put them in my bag, before stepping into the worn boat shoes. I probably should have tied them tighter before I left, the shoes kept slipping off my feet and clacking against the sidewalk as I made my way back home.

The feathered theif

Author – Charlie’s friend

It was a warm spring day so I  had gone to the coast with my friends Josh and Charlie. We’d walked along the beach for a mile and headed up on to the cliff top. People where sat on the grass admiring the view so we decided to stop and rest. In the nearby car park was a burger van so I decided to get a drink and some chips leaving Josh and Charlie resting on the grass. When I returned Charlie had taken off his Adidas trainers and his shirt and was laying on his stomach sunbathing. As I was eating my chips I noticed the seagulls gathering so I threw a few chips away and they swarmed in to grab them. These seagulls where huge. More and more where gathering for the chance of a delicious fat drenched chip.
I had eaten enough and neither Josh or Charlie wanted any so I decided the seagulls could have them. I thought it would be more fun to throw the chips over Charlies bare back and watch the seagulls attack. No sooner as I had done it the seagulls swooped and Charlie jumped up and ran off, unfortunately all the chips landed by his trainers. The area was covered by a dozen or so seagulls scrambling for the chips. Charlie ran back to chase them, the seagulls grabbed the chips as they flew off. One seagull mistakenly grabbed a shoelace and flew off with one of Charlies Adidas trainers. Charlie chased after it in his socked feet but the seagull was away over the cliff edge along with his shoe. Me and Josh where creased up laughing along with several other people who seen his shoe flying through the air.
We went down to the beach to see if had dropped his trainer but we never found it. It wasn’t too bad walking along the beach but once back at the bus station Charlie was embarrassed missing a shoe for the journey home.

The Shoe Salesman

Author – Eric

My best pal Joe runs a bar on the edge of town, busy in the evenings but during the daytime it’s empty. Sometimes the occasional traveller calls in for a bar meal. I worked night shift at a local factory and spent most afternoons here playing pool with Joe.
One quiet afternoon we where playing pool when a guy walked in and ordered some food and drink. Joe went to prepare the guys order.
‘Wanna a game’ asked the guy.
‘I’m a mean player’ I  joked.
The guy introduced himself as John ‘I’m Eric’ I said.
‘Well then Eric let’s make it interesting’ he said placing $5 on the table. Feeling confident I placed $5 on top of his. I won, then the next game too. He complimented my pool skills. He eat his lunch then offered to play one last game and put $50 on the table.
‘I have only got the $10 I won earlier’ I said. 
‘Those sneakers you’re wearing should cover the bet’ he said.
‘My Nikes are worth more than $50’ i told him.
‘OK’  he said as he picked up his money ‘A confident player would have their eyes on the prize and not what they would lose’ he continued.
‘I’m confident but the bet needs to be equal, another $20, my sneaks against $70’ I told him, he agreed and we shook hands. Easy money I thought as I winked at Joe standing behind the bar.
He smiled, looked down at my feet and told me to take them off.
‘You haven’t won yet’ I said
‘All wagers to be placed on the table’ he said placing his money down.
‘One game of pool in your socks ain’t gonna hurt’ said Joe. I told the guy I changed my mind.
‘Too late, we shook on it, they ain’t your shoes anymore unless you win, so take them off’ he said. I was stunned realising that the shoes on my feet suddenly didn’t belong to me. I took them off and looked at my socks, bright red with green frogs. They had been my last clean pair. Both Joe and John laughed as I explained I’d not done my laundry. My face was as red as my socks as I placed my Nikes on the table,  John stuffed his $70 in one of my sneakers. I’d never played in my socks before, that small height adjustment made a big difference with my performance. My confidence went totally as two guys walked in staring at my socked feet. My opponent didn’t have to try very hard as I quickly lost the game and my sneakers.
I sat shoeless at the bar, ‘You not gonna try and win your shoes back’ said one of the new guys. John suggested that he could play to win them back for me. ‘If you win, he gets his shoes and you get the $70, you just need to match the bet’ he said looking down at the guys footwear. He was wearing a pair of worn high top Vans, his pals sneakers  weren’t much better either, worn Adidas Sambas. ‘Both pairs of shoes would match the cash but not the Nikes’ he said. He looked at Joe who was stood behind the bar ‘What you wearing?’ Joe said keep me out of it. ‘It’s my only chance to get my sneaks back’ I  pleaded with Joe who shook his head but pulled off a shoe anyway and lifted it above the bar, he was holding a worn black TN, enough to match my shoes.
‘If you win you get to keep your sneakers and the money, I’ve only seen one of you play so you have the advantage as to who plays against me, if you agree then place your sneakers on the table’. The two guys liked the idea of winning $70 however Joe was hesitant but eventually agreed providing he played, afterall he had the most to lose. The two guys pulled of their sneaks placing them on the table next to my Nikes, Joe came from behind the bar still wearing one shoe, he took it off and placed his TN’s on the table. The two guys sat next to me at the bar in their white socked feet. Joe confidently did the break and walked around the table in his black socked feet. John failed to pocket anything giving Joe the advantage and he started clearing the table.I was confident my sneaks would be back on my feet very soon. However with one stripe to pocket he managed to snooker himself allowing John to clear most of his balls. With one ball each Joe hit the cue ball too hard causing it to angle of the cushion and pocketed the black ball losing the game by default. ‘God damn it’ he shouted. John smiled sympathetically ‘You where over confident with that last shot’ he said asking Joe for a plastic sack to put all the sneakers in. John scored a round of drinks as a consolation, we watched our shoes disappear into the sack.
John told us he was a travelling shoe salesman, Joe asked if he could buy back his TN’s as he had a long shift ahead of him working the bar. John told him he couldn’t afford them as he makes big bucks selling mens used sneakers online. ‘You won’t get much for my old Vans’ said one of the other guys. John smiled ‘There’s certain websites that pay bigger bucks for mens worn sneakers, the more trashed the better especially when there’s a story behind them’ he said. ‘It’s been a good day sourcing new stock for my business’ he said picking up the sack with our shoes inside.
We all sat in our socked feet watching John leave the bar with our sneakers. I had several blocks to walk in my colorful socks.

The movies

Author – Brandon

So today I went to the movies with my girlfriend. When we got there we got tickets for jumanji  The Next Level. We then got popcorn and went into the theater. We both at at the top of the movie theater so we could see. After a few minutes of the movie starting my girlfriend said wanna have some fun. I then asked what. She then said take off one of your shoes and put it in the walkway when everyone leaves the movie and let’s see what happens. I then said I don’t know. She then sighed and said your no fun. I then said fine let’s do it. She jumped up in excitement and started to untie my right Stan Smith. She then pulled off my right shoe and walked down the stairs to the hallway and dropped it. She then walked back without my shoe. I was wearing white socks so everyone was going to notice I was missing a shoe. As the movie went on I started to forget about my shoeless state. The movie then ended and then everyone started walking out the hallway. I heard some kid say there’s a shoe here. After everyone had left we then headed for the exit. When we got to the hallway my shoe was gone. I had no choice but to walk out with one shoe. I then checked the list and found but no shoe. So then we walked out and my girlfriend thought it was really funny. Now I have no shoe and have school tomorrow. This is a disaster.

Twocking Hardcourts

Author – Tealeaf

I live in a Victorian terrace where car parking is at a premium. So I usually notice when random cars turn up and park for several days without moving.

One day such a car did turn up. It was a old, beat up, small car. And It just sat there for a few days, irritating me. After a few days I walked past it and, as is my usual custom, I had a look through the windows to see if there is anything interesting.

I noticed immediately that the driver had left their window open, and almost as quickly I saw some Adidas Hardcourt down by the pedals. Nicely worn, but not trashed.

I had wanted some Hardcourts for ages, ever since I started passing proper fit scally lad wearing them while waiting at the bus stop in the morning. And here was a pair tempting me.

The road was quite busy, so I carried on walking and went to work, spending the day thinking of them. And I came up with a plan. I was going to the pub a couple of days later, so I would walk past the car on the way back, when it was dark, and take them. Hopefully the car would still be there.

The day came, I went to the pub, the plan in the forefront of my mind. However, in my drunken stupor, I entirely forgot about them on the way home.

Next morning, I woke up and remembered my plan. Surely the car wouldn’t still be there next week for my next pub visit. I went out of the house to go to work. The road was quiet – too early for parents to be dropping their kids off for school, so I walked up to the car. The only person visible was a taxi driver sorting out his car.

With a smooth movement I reached in, grabbed the Hardcourts, and walked back to my car. I suspect the taxt driver saw me, but didn’t react. I got into my car and could inspect my new pickups properly. They were my size! They went straight onto my feet and they felt amazing. They were so worn and soft, they molded themselves to my feet perfectly. They were so good I wore them all day at work.

A couple of days later the car vanished. I never did see the owner. But I know that he had great taste in kicks.

Delayed revenge

Author – Lucas

Me and my mate Harry heard that our old school was getting demolished so we got a bus one evening to go take one last look at the old place. It was ten years since we attended the school and we wanted to go inside and look around. The place was derelict and protected by a high fence. We walked the fence perimeter looking for access when a security guard appeared. “Well if it isn’t Harry and Lucas” he said. We didn’t recognise him. “It’s me Nev, we where in year 10 together” he said. He was now a 6ft bearded giant far from his wirery schoolboy frame of years ago. We explained our presence, “Come back in an hour when everyone has gone, there’s a gate from the field at the rear” he said before walking off.
Over a beer in a nearby pub we reminisced about our school days and how we picked on Nev the ‘nerdy kid’ who was now a security guard built like a brick outhouse. A few beers later we walked across the field, the bottom of our trainers where getting muddy. Nev locked the gate after we entered. Inside the building we stumbled over some copper piping strewn across the floor, “Can you just stack that piping next to the door lads, it’s getting dark and we don’t want to fall over it on the way out” he asked. We gathered up all the copper and placed it by the door. As we explored we started to remember our teachers and their nicknames we gave them. In the sports hall, Harry laughed “Superman would of confiscated our shoes for just wearing them in here” referring to our old P.E. teacher who looked like Clark Kent as he pointed to our muddy shoe prints we had just put on the gym floor. Inside the main building we climbed the stairs and walked along the corridor, I recognised the classroom used for detention and said “We managed to avoid this place”. Nev replied “Yes, but at my expense, I spent too much time in socked feet in that room because of you two”. Harry laughed but Nev reminded us both that we bullied him into taking the blame for everything. As we walked inside Nev closed the door and said menacingly “Time you two experienced my humiliation” He took off his jacket revealling his rather muscular arms and chest. “You’re getting detention” he said flexing his muscles as he demanded we both sit on the empty classroom floor, we told him we where leaving. “Even if you both think you can take me on and get out the door I’ll just call the police” he said. “Trespassing isn’t a crime” I said. He replied “But burglary is, your fingerprints are all over that copper piping that you placed by the exit and your shoe prints are all over the sports hall, you’ll get caught” With a smug grin he again told us to sit on the floor. “Detention or a night in the police cells and a criminal record”. Harry looked at me, I said we where just kids back then. He leaned against the closed door and got out his phone “Police it is then”. I reluctantly sat on the dirty floor quickly followed by Harry. Nev put back on his jacket, his muscle flexing intimidation had worked, he said “Now you’ve accepted your detention I need to confiscate your property so empty your pockets”. Harry protested but Nev intimidated him by pretending to take off his jacket showing his chest. We took out our phones and wallets, Nev placed them in his pockets.
Then with a big smile on his face he said “Detention also means shoe confiscation” This time I protested “You’ve made your point, we’re all adults here, give us back our stuff, it’s not school, it’s not detention and I’m not taking off my shoes”. I stood up, Nev squared up to me, his huge frame was intimidating. “You are in a school, you wanted to be here, you are getting detention so take off your fucking shoes” he shouted. I sat back down and pulled off my new black/burgandy New Balance 500 trainers as Harry took off his grey Adidas Originals LA trainers. “Now cross your legs and put your hands on your head” he said as he picked up our shoes “Now you know how humiliated I felt all those years ago sat shoeless on that floor after being bullied into taking your punishment”. Harry attempted some empathy as he said “As a grown man having my shoes confiscated and sitting on this cold floor in socked feet with hands on my head like a naughty schoolboy is probably more embarrassing and humiliating”. Nev looked down at Harry’s black socked feet, pleased with his humiliation. Nev said he’d wanted his revenge on us both for years and couldn’t believe his luck when we both appeared earlier this evening.
Nev then said he needed to leave us to go do his job of security checking the building. He again warned us not to leave even in our socked feet as he’d still call the police. He left with our phones and wallets in his pockets and carrying our shoes. I must admit I got excited watching someone walk off with my trainers leaving me in my socks, perhaps I should of gotten detention at school afterall. It didn’t last long as reality kicked in realising I was now shoeless.
I stared at my white socks and told Harry “What if he doesn’t really work here and he’s just robbed us, how long do we wait to find out”
We are two shoeless men, stranded or trapped in a derelict school not knowing if we had been robbed or being punished.
It was now dark outside and inside the empty classroom, we had no phone, no money and no shoes!
Do we stay or leave?
What would happen?
What would you do?